something is terribly wrong...

i came to a sad, disturbing and very startling discovery tonite. are you ready?

I now find my happiness completely wrapped up in accomplishing massive amounts of homework.

it's sick and abnormal and probably unhealthy, but i'm unable to control it. i feel guilty if i'm sitting here not working. if i finish something, i have to have something else to do or i feel like something is wrong. i don't feel right going out to have fun if i've not done homework prior. tonite we studied anatomy. our brains were fried, but i still felt like we hadn't accomplished enough and wanted to take a break and then get back to it. i can do nothing for my poli sci paper till i hear back from my professor, but i still felt like it was totally wrong to not be doing that or studying anatomy, so what did i do? i started typing up my anatomy notes- something that needs to be done sometime, but not immediately. once that was finished i had pretty much done all i could for the night and it felt so wrong! this is probably (hopefully) temporary, but still... it's just not right! i find joy in doing a crazy amount of homework? that's the stupidest thing i've heard in a long time! ash asked tonite if we're psychotic and bring out horrible complexes in eachother with our studying.... i fear she is correct. bad things are happening. and these are only mid terms! what will it be like during finals?!